TSA new duties

TSA = Tomato Survellience Agency

People using cash for transaction and people growing their own food are now being considered “home grown terrorists” since they are hurting US businesses that are improving the world through genetic modification, fertilizers, and pesticides.      Although the HGT’s will not be prosecuted criminally, they will be taxed at market rate plus 20%.   

Accordingly, Obama has authorized the TSA to enter peoples home gardens without warrant and at any time in order to measure the crop production, taking measurements of the circumference of tomatoes, for example.    This will then autogenerate a tax invoice which will result in a direct debit from the customers accounts.   

Should the accounts fall below zero, a warning letter will be issued requiring the customer to immediately bring to the TSA gold or silver coinage to cover the market value of crops plus the 20% industry profit stranded cost, plus a 30% fee for precious metal handling.   This must be completed within 5 working days, or the TSA will confiscate the passports of everyone in the house, including any twin brothers or sisters  that may live anywhere in the US or in any country kowtowing to the TSA beatdown.

Future advance to save the taxpayer money will use low flying drones to collect HGT crop production value, using a Goldman Sachs produced algorithm to calculate eventual market value of tilled land and actual crops detected, and autogenerate a tax bill.     Obama calculates that this will save the American Taxpayer over 7.8 Billion per year, while protecting US Corporations and foreign corporations which provide campaign contributions.   

Obama gloated “It’s another Win, Win, Win public private partnership using technology to increase our freedom and the American way of life”

Welcome to the New World Disorder ™ making sure that American Corporations are safe from sovereign individuals.